


our memories of yesterday.

by akawrites



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Akaashi Keiji is a Mess, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou Fluff, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff and Angst, Haikyuu Secret Santa, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Marriage undertones, Pre and post timeskip undertones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:00:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28183563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akawrites/pseuds/akawrites
Summary: Akaashi Keiji hadn’t been completely true to himself lately, had he been dumbfounded by the bright light straight ahead of him, as though he’d been completely aware this whole time of what he should be doing right now.But, was it too late?Memories leading up to now brought him here.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Kudos: 15
Collections: Haikyuu Secret Santa 2020





	our memories of yesterday.

**Author's Note:**

> helloooooo! this is my first post on ao3, and it’s also a gift for a secret santa event, so i hope this finds my receiver well, and well, whoever comes across it. i hope you enjoy akaashi being a gay mess!!! :)

Night amassed, all that stood visible to the nude eye was the specked stars illuminating from the dark blue atmosphere up above. The waft flowed up and around my Fukurōdani-labeled jacket that had been loosely wrapped around my torso and through my arms, unzipped. You hadn’t chosen to wear any type of coverage, instead, you’d decided to wear your signature shirt, labelled 'The Way of the Ace' and a pair of pitch-black slacks that fit you awfully well.

We were laying, face-up on the soft, green grass. You laid only a step away from reach, though it’s not as if it were intentional that we’d ended up this close. Your measly breaths turned into grey balls of fog, must’ve been from the temperature. I couldn’t tell you exactly, but it was cold. You had some gut coming out *that* underdressed, honestly. You knew that there was an impending outcome from this, you’d catch a nasty cold. But you didn’t worry about it, you just kept staring up at those glistening, gleaming stars. So carefree, I sometimes wonder what goes on in your mind, what worries and fears contrast from all of mine. All of your doubts and faults post-game, what kind of stress fuels you to spike that last ball. I wonder, I truly wonder. 

As fog kept departing from your plump lips, I resided looking into your rounded, golden orbs. I hadn’t perceived at the time why I was so intrigued with you as a person, perhaps it may be because you seemed interesting. Interesting, to the point where I can’t even begin to comprehend where your mindset lies. I was stuck on you. Stuck, like a detective on a case begging to be enclosed. You were my victim, and I prevailed as your detective.

Though, in no time, you immediately caught my ongoing glare. You seemed—happy. Even though you’d known this was all about to come to an end soon, even though you knew that one day your reign of volleyball would be over just like that—you kept smiling. It was a rather beaming one at that, I'm envious of you, Bokuto-san.

“ Hey, ‘Kaashi? “

“ Yes, Bokuto-san? “

Silence erupted.

“ We’re going to win them all, okay? “

” Win what? “

He let out a flabbergasted chuckle as if he’d just been pummeled with the most obvious question ever.

“ All of our games, ‘Kaashi! What else? “

“ Ah, yes. Alright. “

I couldn’t help but let a mere smile brush over my thin lips.

However, in the blink of an eye, you escaped; my case is now left cold.

———

Only up until a few years later, did I have you up close once again. Well, I guess you can’t really render it being per-say ‘up close’, but I’d still been able to deduce your every move. You were standing from afar, your figure still brutally visible. It was surprising how even from meters away, you’d been able to uphold such a basking presence. I stood idle in the sidelines while you ran freely, spiking every ball you’d been handed.

It’s nice to watch you play again, Bokuto.

———

Days passed, I couldn’t help but lay in bed and daydream about your face. The way you’d effortlessly make your way up the court and jump as though you could touch the sky. Truly, you were an idol. A fleeting idol, I was struck in awe of your presence. 

You shone like a star. A star that’d been too far to even reach. Had I been smart enough in highschool to spit out my words. Had i been troubled enough to not even come close to saying but an ounce of what I felt.

Instead, I let you slip away out of my grasp.

Where was I going with my life again?

I don’t know.

I’m lost without you.

Is there anyway to rewrite time and say what I’d been yearning to all of these years? 

——

It hurts.

You’re but a travel away. Miles, hours even. You’re too far out of reach, but in somehow, some way, you still shine like a star. 

Never have you failed to be such a bundle of sunshine, but a whimsical mess of admiration and all things sparkly.

I miss you.

Wait.

A small ding is heard coming from my phone. It was sent along with a brush of vibration as-well, which had initially caused me to jump. 

Texts are not an ordinary thing for me. The only texts I receive are but notifications from my department to advance in my works.

Though, I was surprised.

Hell, maybe even flustered.

The text was from you. It was sweet and simple. A part of me lit up. Had you remembered through all of these years?

Swiping the notification to the side, I adjust my cheap glasses and take a closer look. 

" Hey, hey, hey!!! Happy birthday, ‘gaashi! We should get some barbecue later, it’s on me. “

Is what the text read.

Was this real? Was I actually seeing you again?

I had no time to decline an offer such as the one you’d given me just then.

Again, where was I going?

——

You were sitting eagerly at a fine-dine table, a few utensils placed on each side of it. Just how expensive was this place? With a bow, I take a seat, and you light up.

You’re so close,

Yet, you’re so far away.

You’re blinding me.

I can’t let this feeling slide from my palms again.

——

The silence is loud, what’d i just say again?

Fear, fear, fear.

It’s as though the world has gone blurry.

Where’s your smile?

Please.

Please smile, smile for me.

Finally.

A smile.

It’s mere, but it looks pitiful. Your eyebrows are furrowed in a negative motion, It’s scaring me. As the violinist continues their rhythmic tune to set the mood of the restaurant, the sound gives out as you open your arms wide. 

What is this?

I feel warm.

Your arms feel as though they’re but a fragment of my imagination,

But alas, finally,

They aren’t.

This feels good.

This is the feeling of being found.

——

It’s raining, but it feels like it’s the epitome of all that is sunny, really. Your face is lit up as we watch a classic show, Friends. As your hot breath lingers in the cold air, we scoot closer together. Now, the warmth is unbearable. Though, it’s okay. I don’t mind. I could stay like this forever.

This warmth, this setting, the sound of bacon grilling on the stovetop.. it had all happened so quickly. As though I was caught in an uncalled-for trance. Had you been that magical enough to win my heart over just like that? Maybe so. 

It’s not everyday this happens to someone, so, thank you.

Thank you, Koutarou. 

Thank you for believing in me when I was in my depths of despair,

When I was screaming underwater for your reassurance.

Thank you for waiting those few minutes as you stood down the aisle of our wedding,

For all of the memories of yesterday and the day before.

Laying my head on your shoulder, it feels as though it was all just a dream. Even if it is, I don’t care. You’re mine now, and it’s all that matters.

Remembering all of those cold nights alone, relying on multiple energy drinks for the tiniest ounce of relief, now transitioning to hot cocoa and cheesy movies like Titanic.

Needless to say,

I love you, Koutarou.

**Author's Note:**

> so, yeah! the ending is open-minded, free to whatever you want it to be. akaashi could be dreaming or he couldn’t be, who knows? hehe :)


End file.
